Tag Archives: period wise

Farewell 2014

2014 will soon be little more than a bundle of memories captured in words and pictures, thoughts and things.

2015 will provide new opportunities to narrow focus and lean hard into what’s important.

What’s important?

Why, all things period wise, of course!

Take a moment and think back over your year, period wise.

  • What changes should you make going forward into 2015?
  • How would you like your experience to be different?
  • Who, within your influence, could benefit from your insight?

Ready or not, here it comes!  Five, four, three, two, one…Happy New Year!

Today

Today is important.

It’s the first day of the rest of your life.

Make it count.

Make a difference – in yourself, in others, in the world around you.

Make a difference – period wise – for yourself, for others, for the world around you!

Today is the most important day of your life.

Why?

Because today is all you have.

Happy or Meaningful?

Do you prefer your menstrual experience to be happy?

Or…meaningful?

“Happy” speaks of self – of attending to that which makes self content and which moves self in the direction desired.  Happiness focuses on self first.

“Meaningful” speaks of others – our actions toward others uplift and help move them in a direction that is empowering.  Meaningfulness focuses on others.

So, I ask again.

Do you prefer your menstrual experience to be happy?  Or, meaningful?

Can it be both?

Sure it can.

But, instead of starting with “what will make my period a happy one” begin instead with “how can my menstrual experience, wisdom, knowledge, and attitude be meaningful to others?”

As you focus on empowering others period wise, you will find true happiness and fulfillment in your own menstrual experience.

Make a meaningful difference in the life of your girl – empower her to be period wise.  Encourage her to embrace her cycle.  Let her know it’s okay (by example) to confident carry and to stand up to those who would seek to embarrass her and shame her into denying her menstruation.

#confidentcarry #May9

In with the New

A very important thing to remember from this day forward, for the next 364 days, is: change the year to from 2013 to 2014.

Apart from changing the 3 to a 4 in 2014, what else needs our attention as we welcome the new year and all the new it brings with it?

A new year is like other new things…it likes company.

Ever buy a new purse? Yep, a new purse begs for new shoes. A new house? Yep…gotta have a new sofa and new curtains. No way that old stuff is gonna work with new.

The same is true with a new year.  Why would anyone want to bring in that old stuff we lived in throughout 2013 and clutter 2014 with it. Nobody I know wants to end 2014 on the same page they ended 2013 on, but they’re bringing everything with them when they change that 3 to a 4.

Let’s change it up.

Let’s make 2014 a year that redefines menstruation and all things period wise. Let’s make it a year of discovery, of excitement, of body literacy, and acceptance.

  • What period wise resolutions will you make?
  • What unwise period habits will you break?
  • What period wise dreams will you wake?
  • What period wise chances will you take?
  • What weakness, period wise, will you stake?
  • What period product will you wisely shake?
  • What period litter will you forsake?
  • What will you change, period wise, and for who’s sake?
  • What action will ease another’s ache, period wise?

It’s time.

Day 1.

The past has passed. The future lies before us – each day new. Let’s embrace it and live fully as we lean hard into who we are and who we want to be this next year.

Begin now…there’s no better time than the present.

I can’t think of a better way to ring in the new year!

Happy New Year, everyone!

Make Your Own Happiness

Sometimes you have to make your own happiness.

Yes, you do.

When was the last time you bemoaned…anything? (an event, a relationship, a happening, a loss, a lack, a disappointment, a frustration, a hurt…menstruation, hormonal changes)

How much time did you spend griping about it? How much effort did you invest in your expressions of discontent?

My guess is that more time, energy and activity was spent bemoaning (whatever it was) than on finding happiness.

Now, I’ll agree with you. Sometimes it’s hard to find that little sparkle when the sparks fly.

Laughing is difficult when you feel more like groaning or crying.

It’s hard to smile when the gravity of a situation pulls your smile down into a frown.

It’s natural (and, at times, helpful) to invest emotional resources on that which eats at us.

But, when negative things and thoughts consume us, we find it difficult to recognize and accept the positive.

That’s not beneficial to our well-being and it indicates a need for action on our part.

What do you do when you can’t find one tiny glimmer of positive within all the negative?

Here’s what you do. When sad frowns have you down, turn one upside-down.

Seriously! Choose one part of the whole and look at it…differently.

Make your own happiness.

Happiness doesn’t just happen you know. It springs from an attitude of gratitude.

Now, look back at the image that played in your head when I asked, “When was the last time you bemoaned…anything?”

Find the sparkle. Look for the tiny glimmer. Turn a frown upside-down. Find something you can feel positive and good about.

Make your own happiness – especially period wise.

Gifting the Girls in Your Life

When you gifted the girls in your life this holiday season, did you give a gift that keeps on giving? a gift that will provide opportunity to learn? a gift that will encourage growth? a gift that will support  acceptance of and appreciation for who she is? a gift that will assure her that body literacy is good…positive…necessary?

Information opens the door to knowledge and knowledge applied is wisdom.

How have you gifted the girl in your life…period wise?

Your Daughter’s First Period

Whether or not your daughter has experienced her first period, take a look at Kate’s delightful post on Stay At Home Mum’s site.

Kate offers puberty and period wise advice, as well as sage mom advice, too.

As you will see below, Kate urges moms – talk to your daughter before she gets their period.

They grow up so quickly and the baby girl you brought home is no longer a tiny little bundle. You’ve been there to help her learn and grow and have watched her experience so many new things. The time is now coming for your little girl to blossom into a young lady. There’ll be plenty of mood swings, grumbling, some stubbornness, pimples and her first period.  It can be a very scary thing for young girls, the thought of getting her period is really quite daunting (whether they admit it or not). You’ll know when it’s almost time and she’ll start to notice some things too. Hair growing in different places, skin condition changing, sleep patterns may change, her body will begin to develop differently, she’ll start getting cramps and a multitude of other things. The best way to approach puberty is with knowledge. Help your daughter by supplying her with all the information she will need BEFORE she gets her first period to help her reach this milestone in her life without being scared. Even young children ask questions, be honest with them and start with the BASICS when they are beginning to ask questions and spread the information out. Don’t expect to just sit down and talk about it all and think that’s the end of it. It’s a lot to take in and some of it may not be age appropriate depending on when you start your talks. Read more.

What puberty or period wise advice would you add to what Kate offers?

 

Who Are You Infecting?

I experienced the following while at a local garden center. (Hang with me…I’ve an important point to make.)

Two women paused between rows of brightly colored flowers. A conversation ensued.

Woman #1 said, “Oh, look at the beautiful flowers! So pretty!”

Woman #2 answered, “They hold nothing for me.”

Somewhat taken aback, Woman #1 said, “Don’t look at them as just flowers…see them as color…beautiful, bright, bold colors that excite the eyes!”

Woman #2: “They make my eyes hurt!”

Woman #1 paused and looked at her companion before replying. “They may hold nothing for you, but they hold everything for me. And, they speak of life and the joy of living, of hope and love, of growth and change. The colors…they make me happy…make my eyes dance and my heart smile.”

Woman #2: “Bah – make you happy, make your eyes dance and your heart smile?  They would die like all things die and then what would you have?”

Woman #1: “I would have the hope of renewal come Spring.”

Woman #2: “Hope?  Hope is dead…as dead as those flowers will be when Winter’s freeze kills them.”

Woman #1 reached out to touch the yellow blossom before her, and said, “You’re probably right.  I doubt they would survive the winter freezes, and I don’t have time to give them the care they would need.”

Woman #2: “Now you’re talking sense.”

It’s so sad that one’s words and attitude can infect another so quickly and so profoundly.

Let’s tweak that conversation just a bit and place it on the feminine hygiene aisle.  Perhaps it will remind you of a similar conversation you’ve participated in.

Woman #1 said, “Oh, look at all the different colors and product options! So pretty, and so many!”

Woman #2 answered, “You’re kidding right? This stuff excites you?”

Woman #1, somewhat taken aback, said, “Yeah, doesn’t it you? I love my period and I like trying different menstrual products. I learn so much about myself and my flow experience.”

Woman #2: “Um…no. In fact, I find it rather embarrassing to be standing here talking about all this.  Periods are private and there’s certainly nothing good about them. They hold nothing good for me…just pain, irritation, and embarrassment. I’ll be glad when menopause comes.”

Woman #1 paused and looked at her companion before replying. “They may hold nothing for you, but they hold everything for me. And, they speak of life and joy, of growth and change, of flowing and the cycle of life. The colors…they make me happy…make my eyes dance and my heart smile.”

Woman #2: “Excited about period products?  Ha! They are just something to use and throw away – a waste of money really, and totally nasty. At the end of a week, what do you have? Nothing but a pile of smelly trash.”

Woman #1: “I have joy in flowing and in embracing every part of my period…of my cycle…of myself. I have the satisfaction of being self aware and comfortable with who I am. It’s not nasty. There’s nothing nasty about it.  It’s normal.”

Woman #2: “Joy in flowing? Embracing your cycle? What…are you weird or something?  Periods aren’t something to enjoy…they are something to endure and live between. And, these colorful period products…they’re colorful for a reason, you know.  They want your money and don’t give a care about you or your period.”

Woman #1 reached out to touch the yellow box before her, and said, “You’re probably right.  I guess I do sound a bit odd, when I stop and think of it.  I’ll just get a box of tampons and….”

Woman #2: “Now you’re talking sense.”

Be careful. Our words and attitudes infect others – and usually it’s those closest to us…those we care about the most.

  • Be period wise – especially when talking with girls, tweens, and teens.
  • Be period positive and encourage others to embrace themselves –  their cycles – their periods.

If you saw yourself in Woman #2, please find healing before you infect others around you.

If you don’t know where to turn or how to find help and healing, drop me an email and let’s see if we can get you headed in a healthier direction.

Menstruation Vacation

How is it that you and I don’t truly appreciate something until it’s gone?

And, why is it we have difficulties seeing the whole of a thing while we are in the midst of it?

I have been on the outside of menstruation looking in for a while now.  No longer caught up in my own flow, I am free to observe others and to engage others about their flow.

But, in the past few months, I’ve found myself NOT taking opportunities to do so. In fact, I found myself distancing myself from menstruation.

 

 

Before I knew it, I was on a menstruation vacation.

 

 

Unsure what was going on and why, I assumed at first, that I had backed away because I was still grieving my own loss of flow and, perhaps, in some way found it “painful” to talk of periods or participate in some way in the menstrual experience of another.

But, no…that wasn’t it.

Then, I wondered if I had pulled away from things period wise because I was questioning myself and my direction. Why am I’m doing what I’m doing, what’s the purpose of it all, and am I making a difference are all valid questions.

But, no…that wasn’t quite it either.

And, then, I knew.

I was simply enjoying a break from menstruation just like many other women do from time to time.  Without my own flow to distract me, I was free to focus on things other than menstruation and all the crampy things it can bring to mind and to body.

Yeah…I did say “crampy things.”

I had developed a  “so what?” attitude about all the good things menstruation brings to bear in a woman’s life and assured myself that there were many online who could/would step in and step up in my absence.  A menstrual vacation called to me and I answered…gladly.

I felt I needed a break – maybe even deserved one.

The only menstrual breaks (physically and mentally) that I had ever taken since beginning to menstruate at age 15 were during the 24 months I was pregnant – and that had been many years ago. (Three pregnancies, not one!)  Even after my hysterectomy, I immediately began tracking my cycles again and was very active in the menstrual experiences of others as a menstrual advocate and activist.

But…without my own flow to guide me and with my cycles at times erratic, I found it difficult to keep my direction true. I faltered, grew weary, and pulled back from that which I had embraced wholeheartedly, and desired above all else.

  • to encourage and support others in their menstrual experiences
  • be an advocate for change and the end of menstrual taboos
  • to be a resource
  • to provide not only information, but connection as well

I can look back on the past months and realize it was time for a vacation.  Mentally and physically I needed one. And, so without receiving my permission, body and mind took one from menstruation.

Oh, I tweeted a little.  And, I blogged off and on.  But, my mind and heart were not on things period wise. And, I’ll admit that at times I did sit looking at a blank page here in my blog editor and wondered what Period Wise was all about and why – and if it was making a difference – and why I seemed to have nothing to say, period wise.

We all need a break from time to time.  My break came of necessity. Change within and without forced me to take a step back and reevaluate things period wise.

And, not only reevaluate things period wise, but reevaluate myself and where I wish to go from this point forward.

During my vacation from menstruation, I found myself continually confronted with things…period wise.

  • A friend had menstrual issues and needed to share with someone.
  • Another had a hysterectomy which prompted many questions about things she was experiencing and concerns she had.
  • My daughter freely shared of her own experiences – so freely that for the first time ever she removed her panty with pad attached and left it lying on the bathroom floor in clear view of all…panty blood stains, her unique sleep blood/flow pattern on her Infinity Overnight pad….
  • Daily, I received emails from people I didn’t know, who requested information and advice (period wise) and I found myself answering them…all of them.
  • Every time I went somewhere I detected menstruation (smell, sight, sound) and women at various points in their cycle.
  • Women I knew well and saw often? I automatically tracked them cycle wise and watched for signs period wise.

Just because I had taken a menstruation vacation didn’t mean others could or did, or that their needs and concerns stopped period wise.  And…as I found out, concerns, habits and desires of my own don’t stop when vacation starts.

When I was pregnant those 24 months and took a vacation from menstruation, I can’t say that I never thought about periods or wondered when my next would start and what it would be like.  I did. Though I did not cycle during those pregnant months, my mind looked ahead to when I would.

This menstruation vacation has been similar – with each hormonal change my body and mind have gone through in the past few months, I’ve felt drawn to think of menstruation.  Each time I’ve walked into a store, I’ve felt drawn to walk by the feminine hygiene aisle. With each login on my computer, I’ve felt drawn to check my email for things period wise. Each time I’ve seen someone I would tag as possibly cycling, I wondered…where is she in her cycle, and is she menstruating, and if so, is all well with her…is she happy and satisfied with her experience?

The thoughts I shared Friday appear to indicate that it’s nearing time for my menstruation vacation to end.  And, now, with this entry following so closely on the heels of the other…yes…

…it’s time for me to get back into the flow of things.

Perhaps it’s time for Period Wise to see a change in flow that reflects where I am in my own cycle of life…more relaxed, more open, more focused, more sure of “what next” and more ready than ever to take on life…period wise.

Will you join me?

I’d love to hear your period wise thoughts and questions period wise. Feel free to email me or post comments here, on TwitterFacebook, or Pinterest.  I look forward to hearing from you about all things period wise!

Girl Wise

I watched a brief video of my 3 month old granddaughter this evening.

She’s precious – oh, so precious.

And, she’s girl – all girl.  From the top of her red head, to her hiccupy giggle, to her tiny toes, this baby is girl.

100% girl.

I feel such emotion for this child…this grandchild of mine.

For, I am girl, too.

I hope her dad never tells her she can’t do something because she is girl. And, I hope he never says a negative word about menstruation in her presence, especially about her own.

it’s easier to speak with those I don’t know or can’t see (via tweets, emails, phone calls) about issues dear to the heart than it is to find words and opportunity to speak and address important things that can make or break the way this girl sees her girl experience and herself as girl.

I thought I had adequately prepared my son for things menstrual.  But, in my preparation, I failed to consider that one day he would be instrumental in the attitude and views his daughter would have about herself and her periods.

How do I tell him what’s on my heart?

How do I speak the words that are more emotion than vowels and consonants?

Where do I begin?  How do I begin?

I will craft a letter.  It will begin like this:

Dear Son,

You are the most influential person in girl’s life.  She will see herself through your eyes and your words will be what drafts her identity.

She is girl. Embrace that early and never speak against it. Lift her girlness high and hold it in esteem.  Refrain from making light of her tears, of her emotions, of her inability to be/act/ react as boy (why would she want or need to? She is girl).

She is girl.  One day she will enter puberty and the transformation she was born for will begin. She will grow breasts, and pubic hair, and, yes, she will have periods and all the wonders that go with it.

She will look to you for affirmation and confirmation of her identity as girl and her evolving identity as woman. Don’t let her down. Lift her up. Empower her to embrace all that being girl involves.  Love her and teach her to love herself as girl.  Allow her to experiment and experience life, but never give her cause to hate being girl.

Ah, my heart is too full to continue.

And, my mind is too full of memories from my own girlhood…of my dad…of my own girl experiences and struggles.

I wonder…have you any advice for me?  How can I help my son become girl wise and thereby capable of becoming period wise?