Monthly Archives: June 2014

Faking It

Did you ever fake it?

I did – as a 7th grader.  In my group, I was the only one who had not yet reached menarche.

The new ad by Hello Flo brought back so many memories.  I’ve laughed and cried.  And, I’ve wanted to hug that little 7th grader from my past who lied about starting and assure her that it’s okay to be different.

Be yourself.  You can’t be anyone else.  Being honest about your experience and true to yourself is period wise.

Finding Normal

Everyone knows what normal is…right?

Normal is…normal.

It’s behavior and activity that is common.  It’s what we assume is experienced by most, if not all.  It’s what’s expected. It’s what we’re accustomed to.

Did you know that what you consider normal might not be “normal” at all?

Did you know that your normal menstrual experience is unique to you? Why? Because YOU are unique and all that goes into making you who you are affects you – uniquely.

While the words you use to describe your experience are words commonly used by most women to describe the normal ins and outs, ups and downs of menstruation, these words are unique because of the meanings we attach to them individually.

After all, it’s normal for some women to experience heavy flow, right?  And, we all know what “heavy” means.

No.  We don’t.

YOU know what you mean when you give your flow a designation of light or heavy to signify amount and duration.  But, I don’t know unless you elaborate.  What I know is what I mean when I say “heavy period” and I naturally assume you mean the same thing.

If you tell me, “I’m having cramps” I”m going to filter your comment through what I’ve experienced myself and suggest what’s worked for me.  And, if my experience has been to have very little pain period wise, I’m going to make an assumption that may be wrong.

While it’s common for women to experience flow that is heavier on some days than it is on others, and it’s somewhat expected to experience some discomfort at some point during your cycle, considering either “normal” is not period wise.

However, knowing what is normal for YOU is period wise.

Finding normal is important.  And, understanding what your normal is and how it differs from what other women experience helps us see how unique we truly are.  And, it can also reveal to us a need to take a closer look at what we assume to be normal but may, in reality, be quite abnormal.

The only way to find normal is to give voice to what we are experiencing and do so using unique words that avoid general / normal terms like “heavy” or “light” or “crampy.”

Break the pattern of over-generalization and let’s get specific.

Find your normal and compare it with the normal experiences of others. I guarantee you, it will be an awakening long overdue.

If what you discover creates questions or causes alarm – talk with your doctor using specific terms and accurate counts.

Menstruation is not a time for generalization.

We are uniquely ourselves during that brief time in our cycle. Find your normal and you will find yourself. Share your normal and you share yourself with others. Embrace the normal of another and you gain a depth of appreciation for and understanding of another woman and her experience of normal that will enrich your own experience.

Finding normal is period wise.